Fri, Jun 5, 2020

Emotional Stress from Personal, Family and Community Pressure

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Many young women talked about the pressure on them from their personal life experiences, family and friends that builds stress in their lives. Young women appear to struggle with the loss of identity.

Family Pressures

“Absent Father issues. Growing up without a Father tends to make us look for our Fathers in the men we date. And mostly it is men that will repeat the cycle from their upbringing / background in getting involved with men that leave them too and they have to raise the children on their own.

“Then there is pressure from families we come from that we make something of ourselves and taking care of their children and leaving home to maintain their households

“There is pressure from the family for us to get married forcing you to end up staying in abusive relationships”.

“There is pressure to keep up with statuses, whether parents can afford it or not, pressure to date certain types of guys in order to keep up with statuses.

Personal Pressure

“Some young women lack of ambition due to lack of information. They have limited information. They don’t open their minds to the possibilities that await them out there.” 

“The lack of self-confidence has made a lot of them fall victim to falling pregnant at young ages, old men take advantage of their vulnerability and family situations.”

“According to what I’ve seen and chats I’ve had, broken families and underprivileged homes contribute somewhat to peer pressure effects, young women all want to feel like they are worth it and unfortunately for most they are taught to find their worth in things and not self. Self-identity isn’t even a concept to many of these young women, family doesn’t encourage them to be proud of their being, society only escalates the damage that is mostly created from the home space’.

The Problem of Identity

“Okay there is a lot facing young African woman nje! Identity- no one seem to really know who they must be these days cause the are so many types of persona that you as a person allowed to be these days. Culture- now days it’s okay not to follow your culture but follow the fake distractive one instead of our true African cultures. Searching- too many looking for love, looking for peace, some are looking for their biological bloodline so they can find purpose. Running- away from responsibility, from self and many are running away from their true calling.”

The Pressure of The Social Media

“Lack of tangible role models; the unlimited and uninterrupted exposure to media is crazy. The media is controlled and so is the audience. We are exposed to one kind/type of role models, not very much options. Education/information is not fashionable enough.”

Pressure on Students From Poor Families

University students in Braamfontein spoke about their problems

“She said Braamfontein is mainly schools and universities, most of the young woman they from poor families and parents can’t afford anything. They here to get education and they lucky to get scholarships or bursaries. She said there is peer pressure and competition

While others they can afford to buy those expensive clothes and phones there are others who can’t and they really feel the pressure. In order for them to have those things they end up dating older man (blessers). She told me that though they get what they want but there is nothing for free

She continues saying that they take them out, introduce them to alcohol or even drugs, buying them food …”

Search for Escape

The pressures of life with little support leads to young women searching for ways to get rid of the pain.

“Quick fix, we want things and we want them now and that has caused us to be lazy, all thanks to media sensationalizing everything. Good honest living seems to be boring, everything is about what people think peers’

“Alcohol, “ukugrover”/ nice time is more important”

“Even when we get educated it’s not for us, but it’s about “living the life” get a job buy a town house a car and hanging with your own.”

 “A lot of us young women get into drug usage to let go of the pain we carry. Our actions are sad and irresponsible especially when there are children we need to take care of”

“Unemployment, alcohol and drug abuse seems to be the one destroying our youth. In this kasi there are so many young women who are not working and as a result they feel bored. When weekend comes they will go out and meet some guys who buy them alcohol. The problem is that they will walk alone late-night drunk as a result they exposed themselves to the danger of been raped or killed”

Suicide

The pressure the young women faces pushes them in the direction of suicide

“This young lady told me that the challenge they have is teenage suicide, teenage pregnancy, girls dating older man. She continues so explain that the hunger for success, studies, peer pressure and cyber bullying lead to many young women having depression. She said many of them they have attempted suicide, others have suicidal thought and few of them the succeed

Activist call for a clear communication strategy when it comes to COVID-19

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I am Amo Tshabalala in Sefikile Village North West Province under Moses Kotane Local Municipality. I think that is not fair for alliterate people as everything has happened so fast. It has affected us activists and everyone in the community so negatively. The illeterate people while they are still trying to understand what is this corona virus then the lockdown is effected and they don’t even know what lockdown is or what it means. Now we have to explain as community activists but its difficult since we can’t be seen outside along the road or anywhere for that matter without a serious reason. In my community/village they take everything serious even though they didn’t hear what you said exactly but they do what they think you said and in this case it is lockdown and they are indoors. People who are depending on piece jobs its hard for them now to put bread on the table as we all know that no unnecessary movement is allowed. Builders also got affected by this lockdown too as they also can’t do anything and we all know what that means, no food on the table again. Now, how many homes have no food on the table because of corona virus?

COVID 19 PLAN/STRATEGY
Every information should be written or given in indigenous languages but now I think everything has gone too much to social media and my concern is what about the illiterate people, those who can’t afford smart phones, and those who can’t afford data to get the info about corona virus? Information should be accessible by all including those in rural areas. We should work together and make sure that we are safe. #stayhomeandsafeyourfamily.

The sad story of a woman who lost her baby at Job Shimakana Tabane Hospital

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by Sipho (not real name)…I was admitted for baby delivery at Job Shimakana Tabane Hospital in Rustenburg on the 13th of April 2020 but unfortunately i lost my baby and the situation at this hospital makes my loss even more painful. Since I was admitted I realised that there are no precautions in place for Corona virus in this hospital. I am saying this because the visiting hour is from 3pm to 4pm and visitors are from different communities, one visitor per person. Some of them with no masks including nurses and doctors and there is no screening of people who come for the visit.They said that they are containing the virus by allowing one person to visit,but there are more people coming especially families of those who lost their babies.

The painful issue that is affecting all of us is the way the nurses treat us especially with regards to preparing our babies for burial. The nurses don’t have time to help us. Since I was trying to prepare my baby’s papers yesterday till today nothing has been done. My baby’s father was up and down trying to sort out papers but the nurses are giving him different information. I am discharged but I can’t go home till the papers are done in Ward 6. They told the baby’s father that there is a missing file to prepare the papers 😭. I am angry and feeling sad about the way the government nurses are treating us.

I was at Ward 4 and the nurses are working hard to help us deliver safely and have done all that needs to be done but after we got transferred to another ward, the problems started. I was even left with 2 drips till I took them out by myself because I was asking a nurse in Ward 6 to remove them and she said she is tired and I must wait. I waited for more than 4 hours and she knocked off.

Starvation worry citizens more than coronavirus

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On the 8th of March 2020, in Pietermaritzburg, KwaZulu Natal, different communities’ leaders were distributing food parcels to citizens and these included 10kg of maize, 3 kgs rice and 4 toilet papers. The food was not enough for people and those who didn’t get the food were very frustrated, it was a painful experience. During the food distribution process, no one cared about social distance as everyone jostled to get a portion. To make matters worse, community leaders themselves did not have personal protective clothing and some did not even have hand sanitisers. People are frustrated more by hunger than issues to do with protecting oneself from the deadly virus.  

Congestion during SASSA payouts compromised lockdown regulations

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The 6th of May was the last day of the SASSA pay outs.The roads were so packed and there was too much chaos due to people and traffic congestion. The scary part about this was that nobody seemed to be caring about the spread of COVID-19 as some of the people were not putting on masks and not following the 2 meter distancing. I am one of the concerned people about the Coronavirus lockdown going back to stage 5 as there are some people who thinks this pandemic we are faced with is a joke yet everyday we are updated about new cases and deaths caused by this virus.

Meanwhile, at Imbali Crossing there was a road block where all travelers were stopped and asked where they were going,what are they going to do there and were expected to produce permits. Most of the people were asked to go back because they didn’t have permits yet others did have permits and were told either that it’s not the ones they want or they are not specific enough and people who were going to collect Sassa pay outs had to issue their IDs and SASSA cards as proof. People who were going to purchase groceries and buy essentials were also told to go and get permits for that. My worry is where are we going to get permits to buy groceries?

COVID-19 depriving security forces of their family time

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by Nonkosi in Braamfisher in Soweto…On Monday 12 April four liquor traders were arrested for contravening the Disaster Management Act of 2020 by selling liquor and cigarettes during the lock down. This shows that people are no taking COVID-19 seriously.

One of the soldiers we interfaced with was so frustrated by people of Braamfisher’s behavior. I laughed and said at least you are making money and we SAPS members are getting not anything. He said you are fortunate because you are able to see your family. “I’m home sick and if people don’t listen and behave like this,we will be deployed and stay in our camps till this is over. Money won’t make up for the time lost with our family” said the soldier.
Its the little things that we take for granted that matters more. We are working for long hours forcing people to stay home for their safety. It is unfortunate that street vendors can’t operate their business and the extension of the lock down means that they won’t be able to provide for their families. Every time I go back home I am afraid that I can infect my family. To keep them safe. At least the little that people can do is to stay at home. Nonetheless, I would like to thank our petrol attendants who are rendering services to the essential workers.

Porters exposed to the deadly virus

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by Rapule Moiloa

Talking to someone close to me about the work that he does as a Porter, he expressed his worry about his exposure to the virus. He works at a certain hospital as a porter in Soweto and he is equally exposed to the virus just like nurses and doctors. He is worried by the fact that many people forget that people who work as porters are also in the frontline and are exposed to the virus for they are the ones receiving patients regardless of the nature of their sickness. The work environment has also changed tremendously due to COVID- 19 because previously they would receive patients with out fear of contracting any disease. Although they are given Protective gear, wheel chairs and stretchers are not disinfected increasing their vulnerability to the deadly virus.

Ntabi concerned about people taking coronavirus for granted

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by Nthabi in Orlando Soweto…I am a 30 year old mother of two and i am concerned about the number of issues that i have been witnessing around my Area here in Orlando, Soweto and it breaks my heart and disturbs me as a mother. One of the issues is non compliance by the community where people are not respecting the rules and regulations of the lock down treating corona virus lightly. Gauteng has the highest number of people who tested positive and in Africa South Africa has the highest number of infected people. If only can people listen and do what they have been asked to do, stay home and only go out when it is really necessary. I am also worried about the economy and how i am going to survive if it happens that the lock down is extended because no one has the answer as to when exactly the pandemic will end. in face of break-ins of bottle stores, I wonder if we are safe here.